Alright, I really forgot about this... I am sorry, but now I am back. Meanwhile I moved in another country but in the same continent even thou I dreamed that I would move in a far distant place. It just wasn't to be.
Life shows a bit of improvement but there is still a long way to go and I wonder if one can ever achieve happiness. Important is to be good to yourself and be good to others. There is always something useful to learn every day, so please: Enjoy it!